Sunday, The Lords day, I believe that my creator would be okay with sharing this day with my SONday. As each day passes…and I have them counted… my heart has an ache that only a mother that has lost her child could understand. Not only do I grieve the loss of someone so special to me, but I grieve all the dreams that I wanted to watch Grant achieve. For several years it was a must that he drive me by the latest house he had been working on whether it was a siding job he worked on or the house he framed with his mentor. He was taught quality work and it was so important that someday he would be able to build his dream home. Grant would have said a well-built home had nothing to do with the size but the quality of work.
I believe the reason Grant wanted to build this house was he wanted a place that kept our family in touch, he believed it as God’s country, the real meaning of life and in a way to honor his Dad.
Grant is in my every thought. He is as much a part of me as the heart that beats in my chest and as crazy as it might seem that I am drawn to Lowes every few days looking for the next piece to achieving this project, it‘s my place of … peace… just being a mom… just wanting to make the dreams he wanted come true.
The heart ache of losing a child is trying to understand what to do with that part of my own identity; our children become the piece to the puzzle that make us whole. Our children will forever be in our laugh, our joy, our tears… an endless love. For those of you that follow this Blog thank you for being a part of our journey.